Working Through Grief ~ A Natural Process

by Kala Brouse

Life is a precious and wonderful thing. We can wake up every morning to greet the new day with a sunrise that will never be the same twice. We can watch as our child takes their first steps. We can run and dive into a pile of freshly raked autumn leaves. At night, we can curl up in the arms of someone who loves us with all of their heart and know that if no where else, here we are safe.

Every once in a while, though, life throws us for a loop and takes us on a heart-wrenching ride that impacts us as long as we live. Whatever the circumstances, grief has to play a significant part of the whole healing process. Without allowing yourself to mourn, your body and your soul cannot heal.

Society has taught us to “bottle it up” and not show emotion. It isn’t considered “correct etiquette” to cry for someone dear to you. Are we to cram all of this grief into a bottle and tuck it away someplace in the abyss of our own psyche? What happens when that bottle breaks and spills those same emotions, now concentrated, to your outsides? What happens when that doesn't happen?

Expressing grief and sorrow is not only normal, it's healthy. Nothing can be more hurtful or frustrating as someone who's trying to help, telling you, “it’ll be alright.” When in your mind, you say and feel: No. It's not alright. It's not going to be alright for a very long time.

You are going through something that has changed your life forever.

Tears, anger, frustration and other intense emotions become your daily medicines to help you get better. Time is your therapist. The good note is, however, that even though it doesn’t seem like it now, you will survive. You will get better. It simply takes time.

The Survivors Support List

Meet others who are survivors of abuse. This is a safe place to vent, rant, or ask for advice. You're not alone.

Articles and Stories

A Song for Edie